Marcus Aurelius says “Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.”

Marcus Aurelius was a truly very remarkable individual. He is considered as the last of

the Five Good Emperors who genuinely cared for his people. He was also a student of Stoicism.

Known as a philosopher king, he constructed a series of autobiographical writings, now

known as the Meditations. The Meditations is regarded as one of the greatest works of

philosophy which is why in this video we will be talking about 10 ways lives our life according

to the teachings of Marcus Aurelius.

1. Be Grateful As Marcus Aurelius wisely stated “To the

gods I am indebted for having good grandfathers, good parents, a good sister, good teachers,

good associates, good kinsmen and friends, nearly everything good”.

The first book of Meditations is a thank you to all of the people Marcus Aurelius felt

he owed something to. There is much to be taken from his first book. Marcus Aurelius

is very honest and humble about how he learned to develop his values and ethics and displays

much gratitude to those who helped him to become himself. We too can replicate this

by keeping a gratitude journal. Keeping a gratitude journal is a simple process. Every

day, you should pick three to five things every day that you're thankful for and write

it down every day. So if you had a rough day at work, focus on coming home to your family

or your pet, or simply that you're grateful for being alive. Finding time to write in

your gratitude journal can be difficult at first because it feels like another thing

on your never ending to-do list, but after you get into the routine it becomes second

nature. Some of the benefits of gratitude journaling include lower stress levels, a

greater sense of calm and a whole new level of clarity. You’ll learn more about yourself

in the process and gain a fresh perspective that allows you to recognize blessings in

disguise. As you continue the practice, you’ll be able to focus your time and energy according

to the things that truly make you the happiest version of yourself.

2. Show Empathy and take care of your life To quote Marcus Aurelius “When people injure

you, ask yourself what good or harm they thought would come of it. If you understand that,

you'll feel sympathy rather than outrage or anger. Your sense of good and evil may be

the same as theirs, or near it, in which case you have to excuse them. Or your sense of

good and evil may differ from theirs. In which case they're misguided and deserve your compassion.

Is that so hard”

The second book in the Meditations series by Marcus Aurelius is rooted in the idea that

we should forgive others for their flaws and faults – because we, too, are flawed. The

theme of Book Two comes down to one human capacity – empathy. As young children, our

family and other role models are responsible for teaching us to be empathetic but there

are some people who never take the lesson seriously, and yet there are others who forget

the lesson as we grow older and our lives become busier. No matter your situation, everyone

has been guilty at least once in their life of not being empathic in a situation that

called for it. This means we all have room to grow in this area of our lives. The degree

to which you are able to empathize with another person is directly related to your ability

to empathize with yourself.

3. Be Mindful In the words of Marcus Aurelius “Nothing

has such power to broaden the mind as the ability to investigate systematically and

truly all that comes under thy observation in life”

In Book Three, Marcus Aurelius reminds himself, as well as the reader, to be mindful of the

small details. Being mindful also means not being overly concerned with what other people

are doing or saying. Instead, be aware of what you say and do and live in such a way

that you wouldn’t be ashamed if other people were to discover things about you. Do everything

with happiness and sincerity. The practice of mindfulness means being aware of where

we are and what we’re doing without becoming overwhelmed by what’s happening in any moment.

The easiest way to learn to do this is to start by setting aside time each day to practice

mindfulness. You just need some time and a quiet space. The goal is to pay a close attention

to what’s happening around you and not make any judgments. When you discover yourself

making a judgment about something – an odour, someone’s voice, even yourself – notice

the judgment then dismiss it from your mind. The mind is easily carried away in thought.

Learning to be mindful means acknowledging the thought then letting it go, allowing your

mind to return to the moment.

4. Practice Virtuousness According to Marcus Aurelius “Remember this—

that there is a proper dignity and proportion to be observed in the performance of every

act of life.” In Book IV Aurelius tells us that we can always

find solitude in our own minds. If our minds are serene, we will find peace and happiness.

As for how others view us, we have little control. But virtue is still virtue even if

it isn’t acknowledged. Remember, our lives are ephemeral, one day we live, the next we

are dead. So act virtuous, use your time well, and be cheerful. Virtues are moral standards,

and they are the best standards we have. If you can achieve moral excellence, then you

will be honest, respectful, brave, forgiving, kind, and much more. Virtues are positive

traits, so those people that have reached moral excellence are focused on doing what

is right. Therefore, you should strive to always be virtuous, be happy, and use your

time well. However, how can we be virtuous? Our parents are ultimately responsible for

teaching us about virtues when we’re young, and hopefully, we will have learned virtuousness

by watching them. After a certain point, you have to take responsibility for your own life

and attitudes. Eventually you will have to become aware of the fact that you have to

take your virtuousness into your own hands. If you’re not sure what you can just start

practicing virtues, and then find a role model to look up to. When you face a situation where

you are unsure, you’ll be thinking about what your role model would have done or said.

This will help direct your actions.

5. Willingly contribute Marcus Aurelius informs us that “Some people,

when they do someone a favour, are always looking for a chance to call it in. And some

aren't, but they're still aware of it - still regard it as a debt. But others don't even

do that. They're like a vine that produces grapes without looking for anything in return.”

The fifth book of Aurelius’ meditations focuses on willingly getting up in the mornings

and wanting to do good work. This good work is contributing to society in some way. When

you perform good deeds for people, then you shouldn’t be asking for payment even in

the form of gratitude. If you are doing good, then you should be content with the work that

you have done. There are times where people want to commit

to helping society, but they end up falling short or failing to do what they said that

they would do. Often, we struggle to find time between parents, working, starting a

business, or just running a household. Our lives tend to be a mass of busy schedules

pressing against each other. Even with the business, you should be able to find some

time to willingly give something back to society. Contribution does not necessarily means giving

money. We often don’t contribute, because we don’t have enough money to donate. However,

there are ways to donate that don’t involve money. You can donate your time to helping

out a group of people. You can donate items that you don’t use anymore, whether it’s

clothes or household appliances. You can also donate your time and effort. You can volunteer

at places all over your city, most likely. Stoics are focused on creating the best society

they can. When they wake up, their thoughts and focus are on how they will be able to

help the people around them.

6. Revenge is not necessary Marcus Aurelius tells us concisely that “The

best revenge is not to be like your enemy” In Aurelius’ sixth book of Meditations,

he wants his readers to turn away from revenge. Revenge is about anger, power, and hurt. The

actions typically only create more revenge. This means that instead of perpetuating the

cycle, we need to stop and try to find a better way to live a fulfilling life. Revenge is

the impulse to get even when someone does you wrong. It’s natural to feel angry, to

say “I’m not gonna let that get away. However, revenge reduces you to your worst

self, puts you on the same level with those spiteful people we claim to abhor. Studies

have shown that revenge increases stress and impairs health and immunity. Sure, if someone

insults you, you have the impulse to insult him back. But to thrive personally, we must

resist this predictable lust for revenge, and seek to right wrongs more positively.

You may have thoughts of revenge that seem fantastic in your head, but just because it

feels like an instinct doesn’t mean that you should act on these thoughts. Accepting

that they are an instinct will help you move forward. This doesn’t mean that you are

a pushover; you’re just refusing to act in a tediously destructive way which is not

peaceful. Next time when you feel vengeful, always remember this saying from Confucious,

"Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves."

7. Have Patience To coin Marcus Aurelius “Convince them not

to. If you can. And if not, remember: the capacity for patience was given us for a reason.”

This seventh instalment of Meditations consists of Aurelius’ discussion of tolerance and

patience. We can imagine that the job of emperor was

not an easy one. It would have had enormous responsibilities and despite his absolute

power, he still had to deal constantly with his advisors, with his family, and his life

guards, the Senates and and his magistrates. He had to deal with the Roman people too.

Leading the state would have required a lot of persuasion and arguments of all kinds:

Do this. Don’t do that. Listen. Try this. Stop that. He believed that patience was given

to us for a reason. The truth is that the world is always changing,

so we have to exercise some patience. No matter what you do, people may speak badly of you.

In those situations, you have to exercise tolerance.

There will be people in the world that will try to use your tolerance and patience, but

in those instances, you will have to remain in control and positive. You can do this by

maintaining control of your reactions to these people. Patience is one of the most important

character traits that people need. Patient people experience reduced stress levels and

a boost in overall happiness. Many patient people are also healthier. Practicing patience

will allow you to reduce your anger so you can face any tough situation you can face

calmly. You were given patience for a reason. You

were given your persuasion skills for a reason too. Use the latter if you can, and if it

doesn’t work, use the former. Most importantly use them both.

8. Maintain Social Relationships As Marcus Aurelius once wrote “Men exist

for the sake of one another. Teach them then or bear with them”.

In the 8th book, the emperor contends that being detached from society is akin to severing

a body part, and that remaining joined to other people and nature is vital in life.

The truth is we are all social beings and It’s in our nature to form social relationships.

We are each born with a drive to seek, form, maintain, and protect strong social relationships.

To fulfil this need, we seek relationships with those at work, at school, in our communities

and religious organizations, on sports teams, in online communities, and in other social

contexts. These relationships help us feel we are not alone, because we belong to a social

community and being deprived of social relationships can be physically and psychologically devastating.

Once you develop a social circle, make an effort to maintain contact with them for three

months. You can meet these people anywhere, such as at church, a leisure course, a support

group, or a recreational sports organization. Introduce yourself to as many people you meet

in these settings as possible. Keep in touch and meet up a few times over the course of

three months, and if by then you find that there isn’t a connection, start over and

build a new circle elsewhere.

9. Be genuine, modest and truthful As written in the Meditations, Marcus Aurelius

says “Epithets for yourself: Upright. Modest. Straightforward. Sane. Cooperative. Try not

to exchange for others”

From book 9, 10 and 11 of the Meditations, states that we should be genuine, modest,

serene, and truthful. Genuineness means being authentic with yourself

as well as with other people. Genuineness comes from within. Every action you carry

out or word you say should carry the same meaning as what it is that you are doing or

saying. You cannot call yourself genuine if you tell someone that you love monsoons when

you actually don’t. If you show your honest thoughts and emotions to others, this exhibits

genuineness. If you ever find yourself in a scenario in which you must show your thoughts

or give praise, but you feel like you need to be dishonest about it, a simple answer

for this is to just be honest. We generally tell white lies to avoid offending someone

as an act of kindness, and usually don’t see them as very substantial. But this can

impact how you feel about yourself as well. The longer a small lie continues, regardless

of if you said it to be polite or not, will actually cause damage to your emotions. To

avoid this, it is important to practice always being truthful with people, even if you think

they may not want to hear it.

Finally, 10. Accept and appreciate yourself Finally these wise words from Marcus Aurelius,

“I have often wondered how it is that every man loves himself more than all the rest of

men, but yet sets less value on his own opinions of himself than on the opinions of others”.

The last book of Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations concentrates on why we appreciate ourselves

the most, but also usually place others’ thoughts about us at a higher status than

our own. He says that the fate of every single person on earth, no matter how good or bad,

is the same: all of our lives will one day come to an end. Hence it’s very important

that we accept and appreciate ourselves. This may seem relatively easy, but there are actually

a variety of factors that decide whether or not we truly accept ourselves. These factors

include how we think of ourselves in regards to who we are inherently as people, as well

as how others think of us. But ultimately it’s up to you to decide who you are on

the inside. If you can’t look at yourself with satisfaction, then you haven’t achieved

self-appreciation. The first thing you can do to work towards this is to increase your

self-confidence. If you have a low self-esteem and a low opinion about yourself, you are

more likely to allow others to degrade you. The most important step in coming to appreciate

yourself is to recognize your own value.

If you like this video, please do make sure to check out our full Stoicism playlist and

for more videos to help you find success and happiness using ancient philosophical wisdom,

don’t forget to subscribe to us. Thanks so much for watching.