Marcus Aurelius was truly very remarkable.
He is considered as the last of the Five Good Emperors who genuinely cared for his people.
He was also a devout student of the philosophy of Stoicism.
During his rule, Aurelius found the time to construct a series of autobiographical writings,
now known as the Meditations.
In these writings, the Roman Emperor offered a number of key insights on how to live a
happy life.
Which is why today on Downtown Success, we have for you, 10 of the most important insights
for happiness from the writings of Marcus Aurelius.
1.
Seek to build your own character Marcus Aurelius says “The mind in itself
has no needs, except for those it creates.”
We live in a materialistic culture.
We are constantly bombarded with advertisements telling us about the latest gadgets we need
to own.
The media constantly exposes us to the lives of the rich and famous.
When we seek happiness in the form of material possessions, we will never find joy.
There is always something else to want- a bigger house, a faster car, more money in
the bank account.
Furthermore, when we seek fulfilment in the form of physical things, we place our happiness
in the hands of others.
The point is that no material thing ever really belongs to us.
Everything can be taken away.
If we define ourselves by how many bedrooms our houses have, what happens if we lose the
house?
The point here is that rather than seeking material wealth in life, we should learn to
build our character.
We should seek to become kind, honest and hard-working people.
We should educate ourselves and learn to treat others with respect.
After all, our house can burn down, somebody may steal our car and our business may fail
at some point.
The one thing that can never be taken away from us?
Our character.
It is only our character that defines us and carries us through life.
A man can rise or fall just due to the virtues or faults of his character and it is often
this that leaves a legacy.
2.
Stop seeking the praise of other people Marcus Aurelius says “It doesn’t matter
how good a life you’ve led.
There’ll still be people standing around the bed who will welcome the sad event.”
There are 7 billion people on this planet and to try and live a life that pleases every
single one of them is utter madness.
Whether you're trying to get hundreds of likes on Instagram or hoping to connect with someone
on Tinder, sometimes it can seem like our happiness depends on other people in today's
society.
But there are ways to stop seeking approval of others.
The key is to begin with addressing your own thought process.
Rather than seeking approval from external influences, try to find true happiness by
developing a more stable relationship within yourself.
Learn to understand that if someone dislikes you, it’s not because you’re not a funny
or kind or clever person.
There are going to be people who disapprove of you no matter what you do or say, so you
may as well live your life as authentically as you can.
If you disagree with someone’s political opinion, don’t pretend otherwise.
Or if your friends make a comment you find hurtful, let them know.
In the words of the French Novelist, Andre Gide, “It’s better to be hated for what
you are than to be loved for what you are not.”
3.
Focus only on what you have control over and ignore the rest
Marcus Aurelius says “The cucumber is bitter?
Then throw it out.
There are brambles in the path?
Then go around them.
That’s all you need to know.
Nothing more.”
There are only two things in this life we have control over: our thoughts and actions.
That’s it.
The rest is out of our hands.
But, how often in life do we waste time and effort, complaining about things in which
we simply have no influence over?
Emotions, such as anger, are not always useless.
Sometimes, they motivate us to take action in times of injustice.
However, there are many occasions where such emotions simply serve no purpose.
Take traffic, for example.
You can shout, swear and beep your horn as much as you like or you can relax and listen
to the radio.
Either way, you’re stuck in the traffic jam and there’s nothing you can do about
it.
The next time you feel frustrated or angry at some situation or comment somebody made,
ask yourself, “Is this anger useful?
Does it serve a purpose?”
You can’t control other people.
You can’t control what they say, do or think.
So, stop paying so much attention to others and simply focus on your own life.
4.
DO Something Productive With Your Anger Marcus Aurelius says “How much more grievous
are the consequences of anger than the causes of it.”
When you get very angry and lash out, it is already too late because you have set in motion
events that end up causing you regret and sadness later on.
However, the best time to reflect upon our anger and rage is when we are not angry.
By allowing yourself the consciousness and awareness of what anger can do in your life,
you prime your mind and feelings to be able to choose a gentler path when you get angry.
By all means feel anger, but instead of lashing out, leverage the energy and power of anger
to make something productive and creative for others and for yourself.
Channel your anger into productive and creative pursuits.
5.
Negative emotions are a result of negative thinking
Marcus Aurelius reminds us “Your ability to control your thoughts—treat it with respect.
It’s all that protects your mind from false perceptions—false to your nature, and that
of all rational beings.”
The negative emotions we experience are often just the result of how we interpret things.
Let’s take the example of two friends, Jack and Jill, who are both invited to a mutual
friend’s birthday party.
Jack, a very extroverted individual, is excited at the prospect of attending such a party.
He views it as a great opportunity to meet a bunch of new people.
Jill, on the other hand, is filled with anxiety and dread.
She doesn’t know anyone there and fears that she will have nobody to talk to.
This is a great example of how two people can have very different reactions to an identical
situation.
We should learn to understand that the anxiety, worry or anger we experience is not a result
of our environment.
Those things happen because of our way of thinking.
Because of that, we have the ability to empower ourselves and take back control of our emotions.
6.
Be Prepared For Any Outcome and Act with resilience Marcus Aurelius says “The art of living
is more like wrestling than dancing, in so far as it stands ready against the accidental
and the unforeseen, and is not apt to fall.”
The secret of happiness is resilience in the face of adversity and setbacks.
It is interesting that people who thrive and flourish in their lives see adversity differently
and more importantly they are prepared for any outcome.
For them, life is about making adjustments as setbacks happen and see the bright side
of what is going wrong.
When you do not allow failure to stop you, you are able to take small steps and move
forward regardless of your fears and resistance.
Look at life through the favorable lens of perspective and the moving continuum of time.
As Marcus Aurelius so correctly points out that the current of time is strong and this
too shall pass.
7.
Be Insanely Grateful for what you have
Marcus Aurelius says “Take full account of what Excellencies you possess, and in gratitude
remember how you would hanker after them, if you had them not.”
Many times we forget all the amazing things and people in our lives and exclusively focus
on what we do not have.
Marcus Aurelius wisely says that you should place yourself in the position of not taking
for granted all the great people and situations that you have in your life.
If you did not have them in your life, how would your life be different and how you would
crave to have them in your life?
This is a simple but highly effective practice to feel a deep level of gratitude for everything
this is going right in your life.
We forget the simple pleasures in life such as being alive, close family and friends,
the ability to love and enjoy by being excessively focused on what we do not have and what is
going wrong.
Counting your blessings and appreciating what you have makes you feel great and increases
the levels of happiness.
8.
Tolerance is in not judging Marcus Aurelius says “People exist for each
other.
You can instruct them or tolerate them.
“ We are all part of an elaborate network that
binds us to others, we cannot escape, and isolation will only make us live a life unworthy
of being lived.
Looking with compassion on others allows us to abandon or mitigate our judgments about
them.
You have to know how to share and teach, but that does not make us responsible for others.
We must take responsibility only for ourselves.
Trying to change the way others behave to adapt to what we expect from others will only
lead to unhappiness because the actions of others and their consequences are theirs.
9.
The peace you need is in you
Marcus Aurelius says “Today I escaped anxiety.
Or no, I discarded it, because it was within me, in my own perceptions– not outside.”
It’s easy to forget that everything we experience happens in the space between our ears: fear,
anger, regret, joy, sorrow, peace, second-guessing, overthinking, stress, confidence, and everything
in between.
Our emotions define our experiences.
And it’s in the brain that we decide what emotions to respond with based on those experiences.
See that everything we experience originates from within and you’ll realize that you
have a great deal more control than you thought over how you feel on a day-to-day basis.
Learn to manage the domain of your emotions and you’ll learn how to master a big part
of happiness.
10.
Appreciate the shortness of life
Marcus Aurelius says “Not as though thou hadst thousands of years to live.
Death hangs over thee: whilst yet thou livest, whilst thou mayest, be good”.
If we can live everyday like it is our last, we get to the important things right away
without any waste of time.
Most people forget their own mortality and act and behave as if they will live forever
and suspend their dreams and wishes for later.
The key lesson from Marcus Aurelius here is we should learn to appreciate just how little
time we have and to start living our lives today.
We often tell ourselves that tomorrow will be the day we start exercising.
Tomorrow will be the day we apply for that job.
Tomorrow will be the day we start writing that book.
In the English language, tomorrow is one of the most dangerous words.
Stop living for tomorrow and start living for today.
Hope you like this video and don’t forget to check out our other video - 10 Stoic Teachings
Of Marcus Aurelius We Desperately Need Today, and for more such videos, subscribe to our
channel.
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